Well that didn’t go as planned!
Posted On 24/06/2020
Today is 24th June 2020. I am sitting in front of my dining room window looking out onto the garden in glorious sunshine. This is the first blog I have written since January 2020. The start of the year did not go as planned!
When strange things happen.
At the start of the year I decided to take a break from my work as a Health Coach. I had become very jaded with all the background work of marketing and social media statistics! It was just so far removed from what I truly loved doing that I had stopped enjoying it.
To start with I concentrated on the things I wanted to do in the house and the small amount of work I do for my husband. I can’t say I felt better because I was still feeling a huge amount of guilt for not working or doing something ‘of purpose’. I was filling my days with jobs around the house, but I was also watching plenty of Netflix too!
The world stopped…
Then all of a sudden Covid-19 happened. The world shut down and I became the home school teacher to my teen. This is when things didn’t go as planned.
My usual routine ended in an instant and I had to learn how to be patient with the family who had just invaded my sanctuary of peace that I had cultivated at home. I had to share my day with other humans and to be honest it was really hard!
All of a sudden I had to prepare 3 meals a day for more than just me. The constant need for food was remarkable… the noise levels changed from serene to blaring. Requests for drinks, food, things to do was like a woodpecker in my head. I wanted it to stop. I wanted to leave and find my peace again.
During my work as a coach I have learned that I personally need boundaries and routine in order to function at my best. My option was to find a new daily routine before I went nuts! I devoted the mornings to home school and the afternoons to my jobs around the house.
I have to say the cleaning declined as I found my way through this new life, but seeing as Pj’s seemed to be the main choice of clothing the washing pile wasn’t as big!
Fabulous weather and new plans
The start of the lockdown saw some pretty fabulous weather which I took full advantage of in my garden and greenhouse. This was the first year I was ahead with my planting plans for veg and I was finding my stress levels dropping the more I pottered around with soil under my fingernails and seed packets in my pockets.
Fast forward to today, 3 months on from the start when things didn’t go as planned. I have a greenhouse full of tomatoes and other veg. My small plot at the bottom of the garden has given us rhubarb, mangetout, raspberries and potatoes. And there is so much more growing already.
Lessons I have learnt about myself
I have had to really focus on myself this last 3 months, and figure out what I want to do with my life, and how I navigate the word I have around me. By that I mean how I interact with family and friends, how I manage my anxiety and low points and how I find the gratitude in the everyday things in order to keep going.
I don’t like change, I find it hard to navigate and it takes me a while to adjust. I am learning to do this without resentment but it might take a while longer to master.
Now I know I truly am better in nature, with trees, fields, plants, birds and animals. It makes me feel calm, restored and at peace. It stops me feeling sad and if I have anxious feelings, just standing at the bottom of the garden brings peace.
I am unsure what will happen over the next few months. We are still home schooling for a few more weeks. Then the summer holidays start and the world is still on shaky legs, finding new ways to be as a community.
I am looking to start my work again sometime in the future. I have the skills to help people in the way I have helped myself. It would be a shame to deny myself and others that opportunity.
For now, I am enjoying the nature in my garden and the food and flowers I am growing from seed. I’m pretty sure most of us have realised that things didn’t go as planned, but that doesn’t mean we can’t find new plans.
Go check out the blog pages there might be some useful stuff in there that helps answer some of your health life questions!
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